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Thread: Feed Zone Chick

  1. #1
    Mojo guy Grubbs's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Half Moon Bay, CA and wako

    Feed Zone Chick

    I came across this short article on the TXBRA website a couple years ago and I had it saved on my computer. Anyway - I came across it today and thought it was pretty funny.


    Making the Relationship Work From the Feed Zone

    courtesy of the

    “How is this relationship EVER going to work?” The question crossed my mind on more than a few occasions this past spring. The boyfriend, hereafter referred to as “The Boyfriend” had always planned to marry a cyclist and have cycling babies. Then I dropped into his life! BOOM! I hadn’t been on a bike since high school and with the exception of hearing about Lance (aka “LA” in the TXBRA forum) winning the Tour de France for a few years, I knew diddly about cycling. So much for THE PLAN. For some reason, however, The Boyfriend determined that this non-cycling girl might be worth a try and didn’t toss me aside like a used water bottle. It wasn’t easy though. Before the season began, I must have heard “Just wait and see how cycling season goes. You may not want me around by then” umpteen times. I spent a lot of time shaking my head and muttering “whatever.” Then I was privileged—yes, privileged—to have him invite me to my first race. Once again, BOOM! Reality check here. I got to sit around for an entire day listening to at least ten guys with shaved legs (and whatever other parts of their bodies they wanted baby smooth) wearing skin tight, zippered jerseys talk about saddle sores, being “dropped,” and, most disturbingly, how they’d had to dump their most recent girlfriends/wives because “she didn’t understand about cyclists.” No wonder The Boyfriend had this paranoia! I made up my mind right then and there that I wasn’t going to be one of THOSE girls. Hence Feed Zone Chick, hereafter referred to as FZC, was born.

    So why the long story, you ask? This column is written for girls like me who are dating cyclists…the ones who don’t ride and if we do ever take up riding, have little or no desire to race. We DO play an extremely important role in the lives of our cycling significant others, however, and with a little understanding—of both the cyclist and the sport—can successfully negotiate the mixed (cyclist/non-cyclist) relationship. It took me a full cycling season to get a grasp of what was going on; hopefully, this column can help you girls get up to speed faster than I did. A note to the cycling guys: please feel free to share this column with your significant other! It may save both of you some grief. With that being said and cycling season right around the corner, here is the first installment of FZC’s Words of Wisdom.

    Get to know the lingo. For the record, a “chain ring” has nothing to do with the setting for that diamond you’re hoping for. “Pulling” does not involve dragging a cyclist through a much-maligned mall. A “derailleur” does not require tow trucks and cranes to right the train cars and return them to the track. “Catting up” is not a feline activity. “Going with the break” is good. “Getting dropped” is not. I COULD explain what all those things are right now, but I figure you can ask your cyclist about these things as you schlep to races throughout Texas and surrounding states.

    Understand the budget. Cyclists are…um…let’s say, careful with their finances during race week-end (and all other times, for that matter). Face it, these guys aren’t out earning tens (hundreds?) of thousands of dollars for their week-end cycling efforts. They get excited about the Subway coupons they win in primes (another term you can ask about on those road trips). Don’t expect to have a luxury suite at the races. First of all, Fayetteville—Texas or Arkansas—is not known for five-star accommodations. Second, cyclists are ALWAYS saving their money for time trial bikes or disc wheels or the latest and greatest carbon fiber frame and fork. You can pretty much fill in the blank with any cycling expense. Bottom line…the guys are saving money, and you better go with the flow. If you wind up in a Motel 6 with your guy and five other cyclists and you actually get a bed, consider it a privilege!

    Learn to Love Subway. You’ll win big brownie points with your guy if you can present him with a full Subway card that gets him a free sandwich. He’ll be impressed that you are able to “slum” it at Subway AND give him the freebie. I never knew that Subway had so many franchises across the United States. Look for them wherever you go, and don’t be afraid to point one out! (Aside: If you ever read the TXBRA Racer’s Forum, you know that someone will read this and accuse me of making a “shameless plug” for Subway. I challenge that person to dispute any claim I’ve made regarding cyclists and Subway.)

    Learn his Pre- and Post-race Eating Habits. If your cyclist has just finished a race and says he’s hungry, he means NOW! No, he will not shower before you go; no, you should not go to a place that requires reservations; no, you should not touch up your make-up or do your hair. You should get him to the least expensive, all-you-can-eat, healthy place around and do it QUICKLY! You don’t want him to bonk on you. (There’s another vocabulary word to learn.)

    Hopefully, these tips will get you started in your cycling support role. A lot of this probably doesn’t make sense right now…ask your cyclist about it. I guarantee he understands! Trust me—you’ll learn the sport, and by this time next year, YOU could be writing this article! That’s it until next month. See you in the Feed Zone!

    By Feed Zone Chick
    Courtesy of The Racing Post

  2. #2
    MoJo Friar WattMaster400's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    that's pretty funny...i'm saving a copy just in case

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